I Will Ruin My Kids

 Ruining kids is such a real fear for homeschooling parents. Why? Because homeschooling is not a defined, set routine, structured with professionals and other resources. 

But guess what? The only kids that I have seen ruined by homeschool, are the kids that are not actually being schooled at all. Just like how a kid in public school shirks his or her education, a child at home that's not actually learning anything, is just as disastrous. 

The reason I am kicking off my blog post with this thought, is because I want to dispel the rumor that well-intentioned parents who want what is best for their kids, will never ruin their children. Even with homeschooling them.

I have not kept count, but there have been many friends that have reached out to me to ask questions about the homeschooling process. I am no veteran, and I still have my kids at home, so I can't tell some huge success story about having grown kids who have moved forward in society and are now scholars in their fields of study. However, I have rubbed shoulders with some pretty great women and men that have successfully homeschooled their now-adult children, and their kids not only thrive in society, but they make some great contributions to it. 

Let me share some pretty impressive nuggets of wisdom I have gleaned from these people. 

1. It's more important for your children to learn what's wrong and right, and how to be a good citizen of the world, and a disciple of Christ. All other knowledge comes second.

2. Your child is learning daily. Don't worry about what colleges are going to be available, when your child is only five years old. Take their education a day at a time. They are not graduating or moving out of the house tomorrow (unless they really are moving or graduating tomorrow:)

3. If your child knows how to read and write, and can independently seek out knowledge from the best and most reliable sources, then their education is a success. Teaching your child how to learn is the real job. Learning is for the rest of their life. Your job as their parent is to show them how to do it.

In one of my conversations with a friend who asked me about homeschooling, I asked him to ponder the following: what do you remember from your education in high school? 

This person was in their mid-forties (like myself), and after a moment he said, "I remember that I had read certain memorable books, I could do math with a calculator and some geometry and algebra, recall certain important historical events and dates, and I knew some basic scientific facts." 

I then looked at this friend, who is a smart, kind and a pretty amazing husband and father to very successful children and said, "And look at you now! You're a success! You went on to college to study what you wanted, and in your pursuit of learning, you have carved out a career and live a full life surrounded by loved ones. You are a success story of lifelong learning. It is an attitude, not a curriculum."

Not every kid is going to be advanced in all school subjects. Not every kid will NEED to be advanced in all school subjects to continue on with education. But, they will need to know they can find the resources they need in case they want to make tweaks in their education along the way. That is the beauty of the lifelong learner attitude.